What is Love?

One foot onto the ice. I hold my breath. And try to believe. Can I look at you at different eyes?Like the girl that I was, when I was 17. The falling Empires, The shattered glass, The wicked echos of my past. I've seen it all before that's why I'm asking. Will you still be here tomorrow? or will you leave in the dead of the night?So your waves don't crash around me, I'm staying one step ahead of the time. Will you leave me lost in my shadows or will you pull me into your life? Teach me how to be loved? Teach me how to be loved? I got caught up in a maze,All the wine and roses, Such a sweet escape, But I watch it all slip away, Like running water from my hands, Raining on this picture land. The falling Empires,  the shattered glass, The wicked echos of my past. I've seen it all before that's why I'm asking. Will you still be here tomorrow? Or will you leave in the dead of the night? So your waves don't crash around me, I'm staying one step ahead of the time. Will you leave me lost in my shadows or will you pull me into your life? Teach me how to be loved? Can I give myself just one more second chance? And put my trust in love,  Please don't hurt me. If I make myself like a feather in you hair, And put my trust in love, Please don't hurt me. Will you still be here tomorrow? Or will you leave in the dead of the night? So your waves don't crash around me,  I'm staying one step ahead of the time. Will you leave me lost in my shadows or will you pull me into your life? Teach me how to be loved? Teach me how to be loved?

 Define Love I hear you say? I cant, everyone experiences different emotions, everyone had different feelings, okay a lot are very similar and everyone has that similarity, but like everything else in this world, its due to interpretation. Whats love like? If I said how i feel about it, I guarantee that someone else that has been I love would have a different story.

There are so many types of love -
1. To a special someone like a boy/girlfriend wife/husband.
2. Family the immediate family that you love but hate so much sometimes (mum, dad, brother, sister, nieces, nephews).
3. The not so immediate family (uncles aunties cousins grandparents.)
4. Friends the ones that sort out your love life, and your social life, when you find the real friends you know :)
5. Animals, like any pets that you simply adore (come under family too)
6. Celebrity's...the ones you secretly or not so secretly would die for and marry!! and last but not least
7. The love of an object, food, drink, games, TV...etc :)
So every single one of them is different for each and every person and each and every category.

Will the real Xtina please stand up.

You have never met someone, you don't know what they are like as a person. But yet you idolize them, see them as a role model, there voice, songs or acting inspire you. You cant find a flaw in them, and think that are gods gift. That's what I call a celebrity crush, everyone has one, however big or small it may be.

Mine is

Christina Aguilera.

I seem to be obsessed with Burlesque and have recently just figured I have every album she has brought out. Her voice is heaven in my ears and I simply cannot get enough of the woman!! I have endless amount of pictures of her on my computer. 

If I ever got the chance too meet her, I think I'd go crazy!!

Habit. Pet Hates.

My biggest habits and pet hates -

• I have a really really! big problem with biting my lips. I do it all the time!! I mostly do it when I'm nervous anxious or awkward. Recently I've started more than ever, the next day I've got a little ulcer and it hurts like a bitch!! But I cant help it, I catch myself not on purpose but just biting it all the time. I didn't even notice but I've just been doing it through the whole of this and have had to stop, but its hard!!
• Biting my nails. I stopped for ages and could finally stop biting them, then something happened...Boom I was straight back in to biting them, I mostly do when I'm bored, like watching a gripping film or programme I go upstairs after to bed and realise Ive bitten them all off!!
• Rearranging everything and becoming really organised. I at least change my room around every month or two, that my brother actually said the other day, that you will never see my room in the same way it has been before. I like change more than anything. I organise everything I think I have a bit of an OCD when it comes to that this will be the reason why. this took me about 10 minutes, but even though Ive used most of the stuff on it already its gone back in its place, where it should be. I have a filing cabinet which I've had maybe a year and half now. I put everything in there, bank statements, receipts, work for different course, songs, scripts. Its so heavy!!
• This isn't really a habit I in fact don't know really. But beds. I refuse to sit on a bed that hasn't been made. It is known that a better bed is one that is unmade, to let air get to it but. In all fairness I don't want to sit on something that you've been sweating in all night, there skin particles hair dirt etc. I don't even like sitting on mine on made, If I've already got out of bed I wont sit on it without making it.
• Public Toilets. I hate them, simple as really. I'm sure cleaners do a great job, but the last thing I wanna do is sit on a toilet that has probably seen a thousand bums. I have been told off my doctor and my parents for not going to toilets in public ones, sometimes I came but mostly when i have some sort of sanitiser with me (I sound snobby but I don't mean it like that, I'm just quite big about them kind of germs.)
• This is going to sound bad (setting the scene) you are watching a film at your house, there is two maybe three of you watching it, and you concentration on the film is fine, then someone starts like shaking there foot, not aggressively, just you know the little things people do...Bang straight away my concentration has gone and although my eyes are on the film all I can see if there foot going up and down and up and down or side to side, it ruins a film for me, I spend what is probably the next 5-10 minutes finding a position where I cant see the foot, hand, knee whatever it is that people do.
• So I've not eaten all day, I'm so hungry I will quickly buy something to sort out my hunger, or I bought in a sandwich and crisps for lunch, but its all I'm having all day or all I've had. The LAST thing I want it is someone grabby sticky fingers taking some of my food. If you ask and I say yes, it means I couldn't give a crap and I like you. If you ask and I say no, get the hint either I'm really!! hungry or you are normally stingy so I'm being the same to you. If you don't ask and just take, there is a huge chance I'm either going to hit your hand which always get a few funny looks or have a go at you (unless I'm cool with you and you never do it) Its rude. Why would I spend my money on something for me to have a break and you ask if I don't want it, piss off get your own food. I will admit if you have had no food all day and have no money and don't ask me!! I will get you something. IT also annoys me when somebody that never shares your food, thinks it okay for you to share yours. I dont say no to you because it looks rude. TIFF DOESNT SHARE FOOD!

I think thats a big enough rant. aha.

COUNT!

So I'm getting at least a 100 views a day but...For all the American views there not getting counted...what is this, right now I should have 107 but in fact only have 43 due to that's how many in the UK have viewed my blog...I'm getting quite annoyed!! There Americans are my most loyal readers...and of course there is quite a few Aussies at the moment.

My Russian friends aren't viewing as much anymore which saddens me. <3

Rack.

Doing something just to get a reaction. The logic behind most of my doings. The reaction is 90% good!!

Uh-Oh

Ill never be able to take back what I did, I'm forever sorry. I don't know if you understand. But last night, drinks can cause you to write things to then regret in the morning, not because its not true but because you just told them how you feel. In two days I've done that three times, then messaged them the morning after with my apologises...aha awk. I got one "its fine I found it cute." (cringe.) I got one "its fine, nothing will change" (decent.) I got one "its okay made me laugh." (awesome I think they thought I was joking!! Phew)

It seems alcohol is the main reason I do stupid things.

Ps. Ima Fool

Anything...Anything ?

I would love to go back a year today. I would not believe that you played such a big role in my start of 2011.

A year today I made a new friend...ellie.

She's a star *

Awkward...

Christmas eve, eve...was a very drunken night...like very. A few too many ciders for me and a few many drinks for everybody else. Looking back at all the messages I've sent via bbm twitter and fb :| I wont be able to face anyone for a while! cool. the night ended with my brother passing out asleep on my bed, after me and hm saying awkward a thousand times over!! toooo funny!! :)

Pictures coming up soon...P.s I look a state but I was drunk.

:D

Recently Ive felt so good about myself, and happy. Ive been feeling attractive, and I find myself smiling a lot more. Love Life!!

Chicken*

Don't comment on my post, without naming your name chicken... didn't think you would, Ive got my suspicions of who it is, and if it is who I think then hahaha!! Get a grip as if I'd waist my time writing about you...:) Fool. By the way I don't name names...for reasons of It means I can talk about anyone...without them being 100% sure it's about them. :)

Going to be deleting my blog in a few days everybody...

Bad Times.

I feel like such a cunt!

Religion.

So people live there lives by a little red book.

I need to keep this going, I can survive as long as I have got this power of determination. I AM confident, nobody can bring me down. You'll see. Do what you thinks right and you will feel alright, cause when you bad you will feel sad, thats the religon I live by.

Finishing everything doing the best I can, no body to get in the way. Keep the head up. Do what you thinks right and you will feel alright cause when you are bad you will feel sad thats the religon I lived by.

Someone.

I need to speak to someone that can actually help me, and not tell me its my choice. Uni, Drama school, or extra year at college. I don't know how to fill in a Drama school application, I'm actually an idiot, cause people I know are having no trouble filling them in.

Room comes first.

Surely, I thought that would be education...Do some coursework and have been since coming home, Just finish it send it to my teacher, go on twitter 5 mins my mum taps me on my shoulder whilst I've got my headphones equalling in shitting me up. Then tells me to get off there and do my room, and why haven't I started it already...Coursework...since I got home, well did you ring up the place today, no I was in the library doing work, one minute your telling me you've got none then next you've got loads, do you know how much work I've got to do over the holiday loads!! she replies with I got you credit to ring them and you haven't yet!! Ive been doing work all day, I'm so stressed!! Mum walks off...equalling in me breaking down...

 FUCK UNI!! CANT BE FUCKING ARSED!!

1. New Mail.

*Yawnnnnn* 1:30am I was so tired and was just off to bed, I'll refresh facebook quickly see if anyone loves me..I have a mail. I never get mails anymore :| Its from Lesley...(first things through my mind "Tiff I'm really sorry but you haven't passed, but were work extra harder next time and a lot more on the theory) But what I actually read was this..."

Hello!!! I usually like to do this via phone, but, seeing as I'm in America atm, I thought you'd like to know sooner rather than later...
I got your exam results...
You got 85% and DISTINCTION!!! Well done you :) I'm so proud! That's equivalent to A grade at GCSE :D xx"

I couldn't believe it sat there in shock for a little while...I convinced myself I had failed!! I'm so unbelievably happy!!!!

My reply was mostly Omg!! aha!! I'm so happy!! cant believe it!! Yes i used a lot of exclamation marks...I also of course thanked her, I simply wouldn't be at this level if it wasn't for her!! :)

When I get my certificate Ill put a picture of all my certificates up :)

Love Love Love Sugahhlegs!!

Tiff? Tiffers? Titfanny? Tiffany Robinson.

My Monthly Post..

I have a number of nicknames, I'm 17 and attend college full time, I don't currently have a job anymore. I study As Drama, Musical Theatre and Performing Arts (acting.)

I'm in love with monologues and love nothing more than doing them!! I can learn one in about 10 minutes.

I fancy someone who has no clue what-so-ever. I live for my family and friends. I want to make it in acting, really bad.

I'm addicted to Twitter and this blog!! I'm also addicted to noodles and fruit juice!! Tropical or Orange or Pineapple or Apple is where its at!!

My rooms constantly a mess...apart from, wait for it, when I move it around and throw like two bags full of stuff away.

I just went it to a full day dream of a funny little sketch that would be amazing for college!!

Im obsessed with my little red hat, that I wear most days of college!!

I dont make an effort in college, but I do outside college.

I havent bought any christmas presents yet :| :)

I spoke about suicide with my drama teacher today saying I will do it due to coursework, she then said It's been a long time since a student of hers has died. Did I just Ginx myself.

Peace out home buns.

Sorry who are you?

There is a reason we don't like you. Stop adding people you don't know to get to us. Our profiles are private from you. Which means you can see our pictures our lives. If we wanted you to know we would tell you. But we don't like you. So. Get the hint.

I don't even know who you are, non existent to me.

Cummman!!!!

So Ive probably told you all of how I usually swipe my computer of everything, and its why everything normally gets uploaded so quickly, But i swiped everything forgetting to back up my itunes library on a memory stick, having to re-download everything or import it...taken the sweetest amount of time...Just downloaded Rebecca Ferguson new album...(Yes I actually payed for it!:O) It's good I like it.

That will be all.

MAIZEE!!!





'Grown Ups'

I got me an Animal top.

I'm beginning to care less and less of what people think of me, my actual image I like and to be honest I was going to be more girly...but that's not me, so why should I? I was only doing it because I wasn't completely comfortable with myself, and everyone kept calling me a butch lesbian...hum definition of a butch lesbian...one that looks like a guy with really short hair all male clothes...I'm not that, everything I wear is girls I just have shortish hair, which is *slowly* growing!!

But now I'm a bit like meh think what you wanna think if you wanna think I'm a butch lesbian then go for it...I'm...Me...

So on thinking this I went shopping with my parents on Sunday after an ongoing battle of me saying No -I basically got dragged,- I got some new jeans, there casual and got an Animal top...not an actual animal top...the make. I put back on my beads and bandannas on the arms. pinned my hair back, Mass amounts of hairspray, and plenty of clashing colours cause today  I really couldn't give a toss pot and today was the happiest I'd been. I don't know if its due to me finally coming out of my skin. Like snakes do or tarantulas. But its the happiest I've been in so long, everything is looking up, like majorly!!

I have only me to thank to that and hundred of youtube's I watched over the weekend!!

Hope you had a good weekend biatches, Muchos Love!!

Im not shallow.

For me eyes are the base attraction. I love eyes, the colour especially, bold browns, or bright blues, or even gorgeous greens. I can not get enough of them. I'm not on a weird level just they make someone look so different!

Another Denominator for me is smiles! I love a good smile, none of this half hearted :) I want some proper teeth :D I'm not saying they've got to be perfect but some good looking gnashers are the key to good kissers! faw'sho!

The last denominator is hair. I'm really funny with how hair looks, I mean everyone has there off days, I have more than my fair share, but what does it look like on a good day, that's what I'm interested in.

Stripped Back to Basics.

Dun, dun, dunahaha....guarantee every single person that first reads that will do a little tune in there head maybe the same as mine but who knows.

^That was just random.

If anyone knows me well enough they would know I have a bit of a love for Christina...only a little amount though :| aha Screw off, I'm joking.

I actually adore this woman, every thing about her! People have often said "Tiff why Christina..." Are you freaking joking me, shes amazing!! Voice of an angel, Her hair is so fab and lush! and no matter her weight shes perrrrfect!!

As soon as I hear her sing, I melt!! Her rifts are just off the fucking scale! Her eyes her hair her lips her nose...#1 Woman for me!!

I could write about her all day, but I'm sitting her thinking my readers are going to think I'm actually crazy aha...I'm not...aha, aha.

Anyway I've dedicated my life to marrying her. One day you'll all see haha. :)

If anyone would like to get me anything...a cardboard cut out of her, wouldn't bother me...Jus'sayin.

Where's my fairytale? Вхереъс мы фаирытале?

So on watching and looking into the depth of a film I found that most of it was one big fairytale. So why are they trying to fob it off at being realistic. 

Its all about this girl not having love or thinking she's got love or a guy then them going on an adventure half way across Ireland to find her one true love, the one that makes her happy for eternity. Or about how you go on your honeymoon and fall in love with someone you meet there due to your wife being overly sun burnt and not being able to come out.

This isn't realistic, If there is a love story like that, that is true! then wow! I'm amazed.

Were constantly feed with this fairytale  love bullshit and made to think that this is what is going to happen.

Are there men or women like that. 

This only happens in the movies, not even celebrity's themselves get this. When we find love yeah we find it but the myth that films have led us to believe. Is that it will start with us hating each other and messing about and only when you are about to lose them or they are going to leave we realise. Then suddenly we think about it ... but there gone so we fly half way across the world to ask them for there love, to not be rejected but to be proposed to...and all this yes it happens in about a week.

For my Russian readers. 

Фор мы Руссиан Реадерс 

Со он ватчинг анд лоокинг инто дептх оф а фильм И фонд tхат мост оф ит вас они биг фаирытале.Со вхы аре тхей трынг то фоб ит офф ать бинг реалистик.

Its ал абот тхис гирл нот хавинг лове ор тхинкинг шеъс гот лове ор а гуй тхен тхем гоинг он ан адвентуре халф вай акрос Иреланд то финд хер они трое лове, тхе они тхат макс хер хаппы фор етерниты. Ор абот хов ые го он йор хонеымоон анд фал ин лове витх сомеоне ые меет тхере дуе то йор вифе бинг оверлы сун бурнт анд нот бинг абле то коми от.

Тхис исньт реалистик, Иф тхере ис а лове сторы лики тхат, тхат ис трое! тхен вов! Иъм амазед.

Вере константлы фед витх тхис фаирытале  лове буллшит анд маде то тхинк тхат тхис ис вхат ис гоинг то хаппен.

Аре тхере мен ор вомен лики тхат. 

Тхис онли хаппенс ин тхе мовиес, нот эвен целебритыъс тхемселвес гет тхис. Вхен вы финд лове еах вы финд ит бут тхе мытх тхат филмс хаве лед ус то белеве. Ис тхат ит вилл старт витх ус хатинг ич отхер анд мессинг абот анд онли вхен ые аре абот то лосе тхем ор тхей аре гоинг то леаве вы реалисе. Тхен судденлы вы  тхинк абот ит... бут тхере гоне со вы фли халф вай акрос тхе ворлд то аск тхем фор тхере лове, то нот бе рейецтед бут то бе пропосед то...анд ал тхис ес ит хаппенс ин абот а веек .

Anon.

So I had two anon comments from someone...I was over the moon that someone had actually commented but then I thought about it and now I'm like who the hell is it!! :) Anon if you could be so kind, please tell me aha :) 

War?

Don't start reading below until you have started playing the music. If you read fast or slow it wont work read with the music.

Can you hear that? 

*music starts*Today I got woken up and told to go. go where. Its time. MY family need me. My country needs me. I'm about to enter this god forsaken thing. I'm here packing everything I own into a little box, that I wont even get to keep when I get further from home. Fighting wars for men who sit behind tables and desks. Running round in mud, shooting guns. Killing other men who are doing the same for there country and men behind desks. 

Why us? what have we done. Nothing I tell you, WE should make an up roar. Sick of us being treated this way. 

I want my family I love them muchly they are my life, keeping my pictures close enough but there so far... I don't want to die!! there my life, this is to much, its taking to long.

Six years have passed I'm still here, missing my children more than anything. Holding them in my arms, watching them run around smiling giggling laughing make things. Kisses. I write a letter today. To my dearest I'm always here, Cant tell you where I am still but just know wherever I am I don't stop thinking of you. Today I killed a man with my bare hands I feel horrible and cant take this any more. I'm going to go on front line today and shot more men. Maybe be shot, I hope not too just know I love you!

Its really cold today, Snow is starting to settle on the ground, don't worry I'm wrapped up warm. I'm freezing though. I saw my fellow team go down today, I risked everything for them.

I jumped and pushed them it was too late they were shot and gone. I'm asking you to visit there family's tell them I'm sorry, but they were such a strong fighter. 

I will get the bastards that did this. did this to them, to us, to me.

When I do I might not be round any more. I go out with dignity and love from everyone, I've secured a bank account for everything you need. You needn't ever worry.

This was just an experiment, How did it effect you if not at all then that's fine, It was just to show the effect of putting words with music and music with words. Do one without the other? not as effective.

If you got through all that and there's music still left you read two fast. :)

Rude much?

I really dislike students that are rude to teachers and even more so when its consistent. When I say rude I mean be harsh and bitchy... a bit of banter is great and gives you more of a joke around with them. Sometimes you have them students that are just plain right horrible. Today this was me. I did it I cant believe I was...Nicola. I mean how can you be nasty to Nicola shes lovely and nice and I wont forget about me doing it which means I'm more inclined to be really distant now and I will find myself not connecting any more as I will try to not to be rude. I'm so mad at myself for my snide remarks that I know would make me feel shit. 

I did this because I didn't get to perform...Grow up! I got a burst of UGH for 2 Min's then gone It just so happens that if anyone speaks to me whilst this happening is going to get the full front of it...The only person to speak to me was Nicola. I had to mail her, there was no need for me to be rude, she was saying sorry that I couldn't go today! 

Right now, not because of this just in general, I don't think drama is for me any more ( If my family were to see this I'd be killed ) the reason why is because I'm an emotional mess, and for me to really be able to connect with my course is to lead a really peaceful home life...something I haven't got. There's to much going on and each day I get less confidence and more and more self esteem issues...everyone has them I know and I'm not going to say I've got the worst self esteem issues and be some dick head about it (like many people I know) this is the reason behind me wearing the things I wear now.

Why would I make an effort any more...What if I've gone through all the trouble of looking nice and someone says erg or you look rough today like they normal do...Its the reason behind the joggers top and baggy jumper...Hiding, I do it all the time. 

I'm just not comfortable any more!

Did you just put kisses.

"Tiff xx"

Is that appropriate...I mail my teachers finishing with ^ that. They don't mind do they? It makes me wonder, It doesn't bother me when my teachers out kisses but I do notice it so its out of the ordinary but not so much for me to go...Woh they put kisses...How many kisses is normal I mean do I do one and be a bit half hearted or three and look a bit keen I think two is fine.

Brrrrr

So whilst I'm sat here in my vest top and boy shorts...I begin to realise the hairs on my arms going up and for me to get little shivers. Wow its cold! How is it coming home from college I wasn't cold once...as soon as I get into my house I become freezing...What is this ?

Todays the day.

Metamorphosis assessment...urgh, nervous but excited!! :)

Cry.

Soooo... yeah, I'm annoyed.

Why I hear you ask.

My Ipod charger wont work :'(

what am I going to do I need music for tonight and tomorrow.

Tis the season to be...fuck off.

"Tralalalala lalalala" 

So if someone had sung this to me a week ago maybe even a day ago, i would of been like ooh fuck off! with your Christmas bullshit...blahblahblah, nobody cares!!

But today I got home and I felt the Christmas spirit with our house fully decorated now and ball-balls hanging from the ceiling...do it every year...it reminded me of last year, when I sat with my family opening our presents getting changed into our smart casual, taking a small walk to the pub (if you know where I live you'll understand the small walk) and getting the regulars Christmas drink. Because were regulars at our local pub we are welcomed into the pub during Christmas where as others have to book for Christmas dinner.

Coming back home, and then just using everything you got for Christmas!

Waiting for the dinner to be cooked traditionally listening to the queens speech...pulling our crackers, reading out our jokes, putting on out hats, discovering our toys, clinking of glasses CHEERS we all shout...And the eating begins. There is laughter and happiness and joy and full flowing conversation and of course we always thank the chef or in chefs of course this being mum and dad :)

Now...I'm excited for Christmas are you ?

She likes what I wrote.

Hmm Tiff this needs to be moved around and this and this and your spelling needs to be sorted and what do you mean here, your sentences are too long, and you haven't got enough paragraphs...That's what I usually hear when I show my mum what I've written, ever since I was a young girl. Id write something with my mum over my shoulder helping me with my homework. 

I've just recently done my Personal Statement for university's... don't even!! I know I've actually done it! My mum hasn't read anything of mine for a long long time because I just dot show her any more, well today she asked if she could read my personal statement...There was a long pause between the question and me going well, er, I've, ermm, maybe, yeah, I dunno, can, aha...Then said yes, go for it. 

Open the document and let her sit at the computer, I then went and forgot she was reading it due to filling in forms. Just sitting there chilling, minding my own business...she walks round the corner, Tiff, that's a really good statement, a few spelling errors but that's fine you'll sort them out in your second draft, that was really good...She had this glow in her eye and the biggest smile ever.

For someone else that may mean nothing, but for me to get a compliment about my writing by my mum meant a lot, she's the one that knows the ins and outs of everything English...she knows that dictionary like the back of her hand.

She liked it.

That is all.

The Lion, the Witch and the Wardobe Monologue. C.S. Lewis, Dramatised by Adrian Mitchell

LUCY - We'll see Mr Tumnus first. He's the faun I told you about. Come on, then. This way. I'll go in first! Oh! (The door has beeb wrenced off its hinges) Mr Tumnus! (LUCY plunges into the cave) (Off) Oh no! Mr Tumnus! . . . (LUCY emerges slowly, sadly carrying a wrecked painting) Poor Mr Tumnus. It was a lovely cave . . . It's as if somebody dropped a bomb. Everything's broken- all the plates and cups. And this painting of Mr Tumnus' father - it's been slashed to pieces by somebody's claws. (She throws it back into the cave) . . . I found this notice pinned up. (Reads from paper) 'The former occupant of these premises the Faun Tumnus is under arrest and awaiting his trial on a charfe of High Treason against her Imperial Majesty Jadis, Queen of Narnia, Chatelaine of Cair Paravel etcetcetc, also of comforting her said Majesty's enemies and fraternising with Humans. Signed MAUGRIM Captain of Secret Police. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!' . . .She's not a real queen. She's the White Witch. All the wood people hate her. She cast a spell over the whole country so that its always winter here. Always winter but never christmas. . . That poor faun's in trouble because of me. He hid me from the Witch and showed me the way home. That's what is meant by comforting the Queen's enemies and fraternising with Humans. We've got to rescue him! . . .Look! A robin! It's the first bird I've seen here. I wonder if birds can talk in Narnia? (Addressing the robin) Please can you tell us where Tumnus the Faun has been taken> (LUCY takes one step towards the bird, who flies to the next tree) He wants us to follow him.

What If....

What if there was no light.

Nothing wrong nothing right.

What if there was no time.

And no reason or rhyme.

What if you should decide.

That you dont want me there by your side.

That you dont want me there in your life.

My Feedback.

1. Hastings Music Festival March 2010 (Wednesday 3rd March 2010) Main Hall. Morning.
Affiliated to The British and International Federation of Festivals.
Patron : Her Majesty the Queen.

Performance No.  16
Performer  Tiffany Robinson
Class No.  2100
Class Name   Popular Music Vocal Class
Set Piece(s)
A.  Smooth Operator
B.
Adjudicator :

This was a polished committed performance.
Tiffany well done.
You sang with very good ... and rhythm and your phasing was always musical.
You covered this music easily and its very great effect.
Just a few lower reignite more wanted a little more precise intuition
Try to vary your facial expressions to add in text to your performance.
Very promising.

86 / 100

2. Hastings Musical Festival March 2011 (Thursday 3rd March 2011) Main Hall Afternoon.
Affiliated to The British and International Federation of Festivals.
Patron: Her Majesty the Queen.

Performance No.  9
Performer  Tiffany Robinson
Class No.  2248
Class Name  Popular Music Vocal Class
Set Piece(s)
A.  Search For the Hero
B. 
Adjudicator:

Lovely Lovely Personality.
(Nice subtle moves but vocally tell us the story too)
Nice Tone.
More Dynamics
Unique Sound.
Bit more belt please and use stage a bit more.
FAB JOB!!

85 / 100

3. Hastings Musical Festival March 2011 (Thursday 10th March 2011) Sussex Hall Afternoon.
Affiliated to The British and International Federation of Festivals.
Patron: Her Majesty the Queen.

Performance No.  3
Performer  Tiffany Robinson
Class No.  2088
Class Name  Show Song
Set Piece(s)
A.  There Are Worse Things I Could Do
B.
Adjudicator:

Yours is a strong, rich voice, it projects easily and is consistent through the range.
Work now on articulation of text, also on keeping all vowel round; also, find even more depth to the character why is she saying these things ?
The voice is so promising and you have a good stage presence.

85 / 100


1 - 3rd place ( Special Merit )
2 - 3rd place ( Special Merit )
3 - 3rd place ( Special Merit )

Next year im determined to rock out and be the best I can be!

*Ahem* Smile.

Excuse me miss ?
Don't look down that's never good, looking down results in pain and being scared. You've got beauty of a goddess. Don't let anyone tell you different. You have a family that love you, friends that adore you. Ive seen no ones drawings I prefer, your gifted...natural. Your funny. Your smile could light a day.
I hope this brings a smile to your face. Now pick up your arse and come join us up here.

I'm beyond a cutie. aha

You are my one and only.

There is no reason for this post, but I just love the way Ed Sheeran sings this line.

 You are my one. and only.

You can wrap your fingers round my thumb. and hold me tight.

Who knows

Is life starting to look up, or am i once again fooling myself ?

My last week.

Blood. Runny nose. Blocked nose. Sniffy nose. Itchy nose. Sore Throat. Husky voice. Bitten lips and gums. Sore eyes. Itchy eyes. Back ache. Stomach Ache. Urine Infection. Pain. Doctors. Hospital.

- Don't you just love winter colds and infections.

Grade 5. Just over half way.

If anyone has spoken to me recently or seen my tweets about nerves before The week started it was because of an exam i have ever half a year, only because of things going wrong i hadn't had one for a year.

Singing Exams.

Some might say "yeah i bet that's a piece of piss. All you do is sing songs don't you, that's easy? even i could do that" In fact people have said that to me. No its not just that.

1.  Firstly yeah you do have to sings songs, but the amount of songs changes as you go up grades, you also must be able to sing well :)...With your songs you ave show a variety you cant have just all slow ballad ones, you also need an up tempo one, same as you cant have all up tempo. You need to show variation in your voice. for example one song might show your low range and another your high range. How you change the volume of your voice, they like it when you show variation in your voice one bit might be really loud and the other quite quiet. You also as you get higher grades starting id say grade 3 you have show improvisation within a song... you may have a long intro or a long instrumental, they like it when you hmm or oh something in tune anything that fits with that song.

2.  Secondly You have to do some theory based part, this means you look a lot at repeat markings on sheet music, which get progressively harder as it goes on. You have to know the time signatures. You also have to know the Clefs obviously Clefs being a Treble Clef and a Bass Clef. You have to know all the correct names for everything, like Semi Quavers. Crotchets. Bars. etc. You also have to know about all the minors and majors and what key it would be in if it had a certain amount of flats or sharps :)

3.  Thirdly you have to a lot of aural tests. For example Scales, Arpeggios, Arpeggios with the 5th sustained. Keeping in time with the song, identifying the time signature. La'ing a tune back to him, Singing different intervals. and more.

So for anyone that have said things like "I'm guessing that would be easy" id like to see you try to do all that, plus learn the songs and moves, and be in a room with just an examiner and you where all the day is stare. no smiling, no indication whether you got it right or wrong.

Whilst this is all going on to, try having to learn song learn dances learn monologues learn scenes write essays write log books record log books go to rehearsals and put on show.

You'd crack even i did and I've been doing all this for ages now. Everybody gets used to it in the end.

Any who.

Sunday 27th November 2011 -

I Had my grade singing exam, wow scary stuff. The man was nice really nice actually and my songs went really well but i kind of flopped on theory and did a few wrong from my aural tests.

Here are the songs i sung from my test.

Hope you Enjoy

Murder on the Dancefloor.

Save the best for Last.

Search for the Hero.

<3

Im never sure.

I'm never sure when somebody has feelings for me, I'm bit of an idiot when it comes to that. Although you say you do, do you really?

OMG!!

So yesterday evening/night was the blonde cabaret. yes so that was ... yeah. No in all seriousness i think the group of people i worked with for this my MT2 class, worked our arses off!

There the most dedicated people I've ever encountered...obviously that not being many ha ha before i sound like i sound like some sort of knob. Everyone kicked ass. I enjoyed myself so much.

Okay it started with me Heather and Sophie standing at the front waiting for the audience to come in... yeah you know where you stand somewhere so long in a position you start to rock at little be a bit dizzy and your body stats to hurt, yeah i had that then, my knee started to lock, then my legs went all weird and i couldn't remember how i was standing, i lost feelings in my hands from they way they were positioned and yeah was scared i was going to turn around and fall flat on my arse but its fine it didn't.

We did the songs and kicked arse, i forgot a few bits from dancing then the teachers were like if you make a mistake make a thing of it, so i did and then thought oh shit what if the audience think this is me being an idiot. :| shit.

My voice...ha ha. erm yeah, so i had a sore throat all day and could hardly speak was pretty much a grump all day till i saw Hannah :) but anyway i go to singing some of the song and my voice broke in it so i was like shittt, so stopped singing and just pretended it for a little bit then went back stage and just drank some water in hope it would be fine, it was really hard to pitch it so i don't sound like a knob and fuck up the show.

After the show trying to talk to my friends was funny, as i was all over the place my voice would sometimes go and sometimes not.

everyone...well a few people went to the pub after wards. Its a pub there's not a lot to say about what happened, we sat and drank or ate and talked. oh how exciting :| saying that though it was actually quite funny i did have some major giggles.

Especially about my twin sister called Lizzie...hahaha!!!

This morning I've woken up with the worst voice ever that I'm being told by my sister continuously to shut up :( poor me. so I've resulted to sitting in bed all day, doing ucas. (yes I'm still doing ucas :?)

Dont forget me, I beg.

So Like I said I'm singing a lot more as you can tell by out of my three recent posts its me singing in both. (remember tiff this is a blog not a vlog or for you to fob of your videos to your readers.) But I recently like the other night did another video of me singing, Its Adele and I love this song so I thought I'd give it a shot, I only done it a few times this song but nothing but either with people or just a tiny bit of it. (leading to my mum writing a status about it...:| cringe) anyhow, here it is hope you like it.

I wish nothing but the best for you too.

Thank you for reading/watching/following me guys :) 

Neglected. Who isnt a little rough round the edges. Nobodys Perfect.

So I've managed to keep up with myself at the moment. I'm the happiest I've been in months even though someone I was getting with for ages is now gallivanting off with someone else I don't care, It bothered me at first, now I'm happy about it in a way, I know how much they wanted this person. Now without anyone to worry about I can focus on me. That sounds very self centered and I don't mean it too, but all I'm saying is at the moment I'm more on top of work, I'm recording everything to keep documents to get a better grade for college, and I'm in general making documents of everything! its great. I'm writing on here more, I'm singing more than ever, and I see my friends all the time, its amazing that with a little motivation and a shit start how far it can bring you. So if this is me not really focusing on myself then imagine what I can do and how far I can come if I do.These past few weeks I've had stepping stones I thought wouldn't come along till I'm at least in my 30's.

Okay my rooms a mess, I cant keep up with my washing, and I've let myself go a bit(becoming more of a chubby chubster...bring on the pies and chins, yay)

I've never felt closer with my sister. we sat for a full two/three hours on the kitchen floor last night giggling and laughing and chatting, it was so much fun!

I've said for ages how I have wanted to get back to the old Tiff, and I was going to write..I'm back..but I'm not, this is a whole new me, I'm sometimes a little moody and my levels are up and down but at the moment although sometimes i may snap I'm actually the happiest I've ever been.

I have family to thanks for this. Friends to thanks for this. Everything.

<3

Pure Truth.

Just stop for a minute and SMILE!

So I'm getting a bit obsessed with singing videos, however good or bad they may be. I got bored. here we go.

Not about the money, just dance. <3

(theres a few bummy note I know.)

Enjoy or hope you enjoyed.

Show me a garden thats bursting into life.

Those three words.

Are said too much <3

I have a new video on youtube and I'm going to start uploading more, I've really neglected my youtube and a lot of things at the moment I need to get back to everything!! (:

1. Thing

If anyone wants to get me the IPhone 4s ill be forever grateful and happy :)

We wish you a merry christmas.

Today I was asked to write my list. The list I write every year from when I was about four. With the same things on it since I was like 12. I used to write it to Santa. Then to my parents.  Now kind of for me. I write on there everything, that I need to get in order for me to take a new step. Wow tiff its just a list. Yes it is, but for me also its a symbol of I've just finished another year of intense work and fun times with my friends. I cannot wait for 2012 to start and spend time with my family over Christmas and new years.

Traits. The Good, Bad and Ugly.

Active. Adventurous. Affable. Affected. Affectionate. Afraid. Ambitious. Amiable. Angry. Animated. Annoyed. Anxious. Argumentative. Arrogant. Astonished. Attentive. Babyish. Bewildered. Blase'. Boorish. Bored. Bossy. Brave. Brilliant. Busy. Calm. Candid. Capable. Careful. Caustic. Cautious. Charismatic. Charming. Cheerful. Childish. Clever. Clumsy. Coarse. Cold-Hearted. Compassionate. Complacent. Conceited. Concerned. Confident. Confused. Conscientious. Considerate. Cooperative. Courageous. Cowardly. Crafty. Critical. Cross. Cruel. Cultured. Curious. Dangerous. Daring. Dauntless. Decisive. Dependable. Determined. Diligent. Discouraged. Discreet. Dishonest. Dismayed. Disparaging. Disrespectful. Dissatisfied. Distressed. Domineering. Doubtful. Dutiful. Eager. Easygoing. Effervescent. Efficient. Eloquent. Embarrassed. Encouraging. Energetic. Enthusiastic. Exacting. Excited. Expert. Expert. Exuberant. Facetious. Fair. Faithful. Fanciful. Fearless. Fidgety. Fierce. Finicky. Foolish. Formal. Fortunate. Frank. Friendly. Frustrated. Funny. Garrulous. Generous. Gentle. Giddy. Giving. Glamorous. Gloomy. Glum. Grateful. Greedy. Gregarious. Grouchy. Grumpy. Gullible. Happy. Hardy. Harried. Harsh. Hateful. Haughty. Helpful. Honest. Hopeful. Hopeless. Hospitable. Humble. Humorous. Ignorant. Ill-bred. Imaginative. Immaculate. Immature. Impartial. Impatient. Impolite. Impudent. Impulsive. Inactive. Independent. Industrious. Inimitable. Innocent. Insipid. Insistent. Insolent. Intelligent. Intrepid. Jealous. Jovial. Keen. Lackadaisical. Languid. Lazy. Lively. Logical. Lonely. Loquacious. Loving. Loyal. Lucky. Malicious. Mature. Mean. Meticulous. Mischievous. Moody. Mysterious. Naive. Negligent. Nervous. Noisy. Obedient. Obliging. Obnoxious. Obsequious. Observant. Obstinate. Opinionated. Optimistic.Peaceful. Pensive. Persevering. Persistent. Pessimistic. Petulant. Picky. Pleasant. Polite. Pompous. Popular. Positive. Precise. Proud. Punctilious. Puzzled. Quarrelsome. Quick. Quiet. Quixotic. Rambunctious. Rash. Rational. Refined. Reliable. Relieved. Religious. Respectful. Responsible. Responsive. Restless. Retiring. Risk-Taking. Rowdy. Rude. Safe. Sarcastic. Satisfied. Saucy. Scared. Scornful. Secretive. Secure. Sedate. Self-Centered. Selfish. Self-Reliant. Sensitive. Shrewd. Silly. Sincere. Skillful. Slovenly. Sly. Slutty. Smarty. Sneaky. Snobbish. Sociable. Spoilt.Stingy. Stolid. Strange. Strict. Stubborn. Studious. Stupid. Suave. Sullen. Supercilious. Superstitious. Surly. Suspicious. Sweet. Taciturn.Tactful. Talented. Talkative. Tasteful. Tenacious. Tense. Terrified. Thankful. Thoughtful. Thoughtless. Thrifty. Timid. Tolerant. Touchy. Trusting. Trustworthy. Uncontrolled. Uncouth. Unfriendly. Unruly. Unscrupulous. Unselfish. Upset. Useful. Valiant. Versatile. Vivacious. Vulgar. Warm. Warm-Hearted. Weak. Whimsical. Wise. Witty. Worried.

I thank drama for me knowing this many characteristics! and life aha <3

Crimbo Cards...

Do I write my Christmas cards this year, as so many people have been taken off the list this year :) aha.

That joke never gets old!!

Cool story bro.

So yesterday were all sitting at the table for about 30 minutes we then go to the kitchen with which my sister realise my lip, my whole family then continue to tell me i have HIV :| erm i beg your pardon. How! then they explained its my lip is looking like a massive cold sore but i heard it as coleslaw so when they were searching for the cream i said i think I've got some coleslaw cream in my room sending my family in hysterics, then for the rest of the night i got the whole eww tiff you have HIV...Thanks guys, gotta love the family right :| <3

Santa Claus coming to town :O

Its beginning to look a lot like Christmas, everywhere you go. <3

I'm starting to feel more Chirstmassy, as soon as i buy my first present ill feel it more, i wont lie, I'm definitely going to be nagging my mum to get the decorations out soon!! Eeep!!

Winter - My favourite holiday!!* * *

                                          * * *

                                         * * *

              Snowflakes ? aha    * * *

                                           * * *

In Love with this song and her!

I made you think, you don't understand.

I used to think that happiness could only be something
That happened to somebody else
Everybody believed, everybody but me, yeah yeah
And I've been hurt so many times before,
That my hope was dying, so sick of trying
Everybody could see, everybody but me, yeah yeah
But then you came into my life, you opened up my softer side
And now I can see into your eyes
And suddenly, I realize.

I made you think, you don't understand
All the times you didn't understand,
Why you couldn't just be my man.
I made you think, you don't understand
There were many walls you had to climb,
If you really wanted to be mine.
I made you think, you don't understand
After all the hoops I put you through,
Now I see that I'm in love with you

Now, I hope you finally understand.

So many tears I've had to cry,
But you had many more of your own you had to try
But you stuck it out and you're here with me now, yeah yeah
And rememberin' the days I pushed away your love,
You called my bluff and you still stayed around,
Yeah you figured me out
Said, you got me down
And there's no way to lie to you, you know me better than I do

Baby, ooh, you see me through,
I'd be no good without you.

I made you think, you don't understand
All the times you didn't understand,
Why you just couldn't be my man
I made you think, you don't understand
There were many walls you had to climb (yeah)
If you really wanted to be mine (ooh)
I made you think, you don't understand
After all the hoops I put you through (through)
Now I see that I'm in love with you

Now, I hope you finally understand

Oh.

Baby, won't you listen now
Can't you see just what I'm talking about?
Said baby won't you listen now
Can't you see just what I'm talking about?

Time went on, and I was wrong
To keep my distance for so long.
So afraid, you wouldn't stay
But you never turned away

Always right by my side
You're forever in my life
Don't you go
'Cause now I know
That in you I found a home.

Now I can see into your eyes
Suddenly, I realize.

I made you think, you don't understand
All the times you didn't understand
Why you just couldn't be my man
I made you think, you don't understand
There were many walls you had to climb,
If you really wanted to be mine
I made you think, you don't understand
After all the hoops I put you through
Now I see I'm in love with you.

Now, I hope you finally understand.

I made you think, you don't understand

Interp...Interpre...Interpretat...INTERPRETATION!

Starts with a heavy bass, a fast beat. Ass shaking. Child making. Love taking. Party people in club skipping up slowing down. In your system. Flowing, Running, WAAM! Head nodding. Back to life, back to reality. Cut her up. Out your system. Let me listen. Drinking. Taking. Smoking. Injecting. let me feel this hype. Party people in club. Slowing up skipping down, huh. exactly. Confused you yet. Starts to fade out with a soothing ahhhh, expressive feelings. sweaty. bed shaking, cover taking. Night.


BACK IN!
Heavy fast pace. Energetic. Repeative. Again, really? Flashing lights. Smoke around. High. Low. Dry. Soaked. New. Hold on. York. Where'd that come from. Time is waisting. No more. Has it taken. Give me bright...New York...Build up...build up... build up..build up..build up.BUILD UP! Bring it out. Have a toast. Outing of Pass. im in charge. dont even try it. im wild. eat your heart out. Get it up.
Morning, Midday, Afternoon, Evening, Night. REBOOT!


For your interpretation.

All the things i love.

When I'm ill, my mum gets the things that i love, there nothing special.

Yakult...Yes it has annoying advert where the persons "gut" is talking to them, but i love them bring me back to my childhood.

Orange Juice...we get it all the time, but when she got it in for me being ill i was so happy!

Ice Cream...with a sore throat its a must need.

Pot Noodles (and lots of them)...There just so quick and easy and even when I'm ill i can stomach them.

Unlimited amounts of eggs...I eat so much scrambled egg and especially when I'm ill

Chicken & Bacon...a must need for any circumstance! :)

She must know by getting my favourites in it encourages me to eat so I'm not so weak.

As I've set out.

So I set out all of my work today, there's like 8 scripts 7 monologues 14 songs to think that's just come from September through to December my work for this 4 months! :O and the amount of written work I have!!

Theres These Girls.

Girls?! I Love Them but particularly.
Theres three of them...
There all pretty, talented, thoughtful, caring, and always there for me.
They never judge.
Always back me up.
Make me see light.
Bring me back to earth.
They make me giggle.
They make me cry, with laughter.
They sometimes make me cringe with the comments.
Have never doubted me.

But i swear i wouldn't be able to get through life at the moment without them, every hug, every cry on there shoulder, every spec of love i get from them makes me more and more grateful.

Rachel, Laura, Claire!

There are a few more people like this.

But these are the ones that have had to suffer my constant talking and crying for the last year and a half, I cannot be more grateful. You mean then world to me!! <3